Time

Purnakama Rajna

Ding! Ding! Ding!

The 9 o’clock bell, homeroom, the National anthem, and I’m on.

Every half hour, on the bell, one group of 25 smiling faces enters, and another leaves me; no break, no chance to regroup, focus, or breathe; thus my day begins.

Everyday.  

Ruled by the almighty bell and strictly scheduled time, both hunger and calls of nature must succumb to it, for there is no opportunity for the natural flow of time in this world.

Change of scene; a brief long weekend in New York, a mere 2 and a half days.

At the airport my clock and bell consciousness is griping, “What are you doing? You’re flying all this way for 2 days! You’ve got so much to do at home, you don’t have time for this!”

I argue with myself as I wait for my luggage, and as I wait in line for the taxi, listening to other people gripe about time, or the lack thereof.

Then, finally in my taxi, I see the Parsons turnoff from the Grand Central Parkway, and something begins to change. I feel a softness, a gentleness settling in, and all of my mental arguments cease. My soul knows that I’ve done absolutely the right thing, and I am home. No bells, no rush, no time, just being.

In the morning after I arrive, I rise, and do all of the necessary things to get myself ready for my 6:00am meditation. Then, I read, exercise, have breakfast, do laundry, do some selfless service, and when I look at my watch it says that it is only 9:30am.

I shake it, thinking it must have stopped. It must be wrong. How can I have accomplished this much in such a short amount of time?

Such is Guru’s world, and Guru’s flow of time. It is a river that flows ceaselessly and effortlessly, and when you are caught up in that river it is all joy and peace, and a constant flow of activity that is never painful or forced.

When I go to New York I allow myself to be fully immersed in this world; the world of living by heart and intuition, not by artificial segments of time imposed by an outer world institution, which is counter-intuitive.

So then, my greatest challenge is to bring that flow into my rushed and segmented world. I know it is possible, as I do have moments, sometimes even whole days when I can tune into that flow, and resist being pulled by others demands, and the demands of bells, and strictly enforced schedules.

Perhaps this is part of my sadhana, to remain strong, focused and in the flow no matter what the outer circumstance; bringing that little bit of New York river consciousness into my otherwise concrete and immobile world.